Pop Guru's Annual Oscar Fashion Review!

Well, the beauty of borrowing internet is that it's unpredictable - I couldn't post my fashion review last night because my internet was out.  Guess I should pay for it!  What a fab show on Sunday!  Hugh Jackman, in all his girlish glory, actually did a pretty good job as the host.  I really liked the musical numbers, and what would any award show be without Beyonce forcibly thrusting herself into the spotlight.  The Oscars have nothing to do with you, you egotistical maniac!   You and Mama Tina need to realize the Dreamgirls moment has passed and finally accept the fact that Jennifer Hudson aka "American Idol" has an Oscar and you never will!  Beyonce is one unnecessary parade away from being Tyra Banks.

Although the show was ridiculously long, I loved the way past Oscar winners came out to introduce each nominee in the main categories.  Ben Stiller's impersonation of Joaquin Phoenix was hysterical and finally convinced me it's all a hoax.  My favorite moment by far was when Kate Winslet yelled out, "Dad, whistle or something so then I'll know where you are!"  So cute, and I'm really so happy for her that she was finally given the award she deserved.  Although, not so happy she chose such a matronly dress and hairdo.  Just cause you got the golden statue doesn't mean you need to dress like a Golden Girl!

I know I'm not the only one who thought it was cold hearted that they showed Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie during Jennifer Aniston's moment on stage. It was expected but I thought The Oscars might be better than that - boy, was I wrong! That was just so tacky. I absolutely loved Jennifer's hair, although it was "Hills" hair and I'll just have to come to terms with my support of that. Oh, who am I kidding?! I sport a ginormous Lauren Conrad Mark by Avon ring!

Now on to the fashion... Wasn't much to look at this year!  Most of it was humdrum or flat out ugly.  I'm talking about you, Miley.  I'm not sure if the stars are pulling a Nicolette Sheridan and being their own stylists because of the recession, but whatever the reason, they need a fashion bailout plan FAST!

Best Dressed:

Though Tina Fey didn't walk the red carpet, she was one of the most stunning of the night!  This dress fit her like a glove and it was just the right amount of cleavage, not overboard like she was at the Golden Globes!

Diane Lane hardly looked a day over 40! This really doesn't do her justice because she glowed on TV!

Taraji P. Henson was so cute and grateful to even be at The Oscars, but she really pulled off a classic red carpet look.  I loved her hair!  The small red handbag added just the right pop of color to the crisp white dress.

Ugh, as much as I hate to say nice things about Skeletor, I liked this ensemble.  Classic black dress with a grandiose flair by pairing it with sparkling green earrings.  I thought Debbie Matenopolus was going to hurl herself from the scaffolding upon Angelina Jolie when she arrived.  Debbie actually forgot she was on TV and started screeching "ANGIE!!!" and jumping up and down.  Like a real professional.  Debbie was having a major sugar rush from the one Skittle she had eaten that day, so her hysteria when she saw her Anorexia Idol was completely understandable.

By far the best and most fabulous of the night!  Natalie Portman dared to wear a flashy color, yet didn't overdo it a la Heidi Klum and opted for minimal jewelry.  Sophisticated yet bold - ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS!

Worst Dressed:

Let ze Heidi Klum drape zeself in a red satin sheet that corresponds with ze gazillion Diet Coke Heart Healthy commercials that aired during ze telecast - no one will ever be ze wiser to ze subliminal messaging!  Oh Zack Morris, how you have taught me so much in ze ways of wiling women!  Auf wiedersehen!

Why must such a gorgeous girl pick such a terrible dress!  Freida Pinto has chosen gorgeous dresses all season long, and now she chooses this wretched thing with the mono sleeve?  Ew.  I have never been a fan of the one sleeve look - sleeves are meant to come with a partner or not at all!

Aside from looking like a rock opera costume gone wrong, Marion Cotillard's dress can't seem to decide if it wants to be short or long.  It cuts off mid-thigh, then decides to vomit out a mountain of tulle.  

Um, no.  Vanessa Hudgens looks like a teen Elvira.  Why must Disney Teens invade my award shows?  Doesn't she have a Nickelodeon's Kid Choice Awards she should be at right now?

Miley Cyrus = Hot Mess.  I don't even know what this is.  I feel as if it is something that might come from the sea, some kind of crackwhore mermaid emerging from the water to post YouTube videos and slowly destroy humanity.

This picture proves we should never let Whoopi Goldberg out of her cage.

Sarah Jessica Parker aka Wedding Barbie came out to play.

So did her boobs.

Be careful, Zac Efron.  We've watched a young hunk stop washing his hair and lose his charming good looks once before.  It can be a gradual decent into the pits of Bonaduce, but it can happen to you...

Just ask Mickey Rourke.

Photos: AP Images

2009 Pop Guru Golden Globe Fashion Awards!

Last night's Golden Globes show was full of surprises! Congratulations to Kate Winslet on her dual win!!! Her acceptance speech was wonderful when she won for Revolutionary Road. New favorite word: "Gather!" She is just the most genuine lady in Hollywood and deserves to actually take home an award for once. Also, so ecstatic that Slumdog Millionaire won! They definitely deserved Best Motion Picture and I urge you all to go see it. It might not be in every town now, but I'm betting it will be getting a much wider release this weekend.

I was a little shocked that Anna Paquin won for Best Actress in a TV Series - Drama, however, I'm a fan of the show so I was ok with the decision. I was happy Mad Men didn't sweep the show like I had expected! Not that I don't like Mad Men, it's just not fun when the same show wins every award. Though bravo to 30 Rock for their three wins - Best Comedy, Tina Fey, and Alec Baldwin! I shed a few tears when Neal Patrick Harris lost Best Supporting Actor for How I Met Your Mother. Barney Stinson is a legendary man of honor and should have taken home the gold. Robbed, robbed I tell you! However, for your viewing pleasure, I have provided the funniest sketch from NPH's stint on SNL last weekend - Orchestral Doogie Howser.

Now on to my Fashion Awards. I found my jaw hitting the table when I saw most of the horrendous outfits - not to forget that hair - coming down the red carpet. I know we are in a recession, but damn - don't skip out on mirrors!

Best Dressed Awards:

Laura Linney positively glowed in this yellow dress that matched her hair, and her award! She looked like she loved the dress and was, most importantly, comfortable.

OK, she could have taken a second to brush her hair, but I still loved this pink dress on Cameron Diaz.

Eva Longoria Parker was one of the few that dared to wear a bright color and she pulled it off magnificently!

I loved the neutral color Elizabeth Banks utilized with both her dress and her makeup.

Kate Winslet was elegant in her classic black gown - and I loved her lipstick! I'll be reading all the magazines to find out exactly what kind of lip color she used. She's just fab.

Worst Dressed Awards:
Too many to count. Stylists must have cut back on their cocaine usage due to the economy and opted for huffing glue instead judging by these choices. Here are just a few of my faves...

My favorite quote of the night what my friend Chris said when Renee Zellweger walked on stage: "What was Sharon Stone thinking?!" She looked ridonkulous with her peek-a-boo top and rat's nest hair. She really never tries to get back on my good side. Your loss, Renee.

Horrendous dress, Morticia Adams. The drab lipstick and slick-back do add to the harshness of the overall look.

When Emma Thompson asked Sally Hawkins if she needed help, I wasn't sure if it was with her speech or with her dinner. She's terribly skinny - eat something, girl!

Two words: HOT MESS. Head-to-toe.

A blue animal print dress is never complete without a giant flower. Train wreck.

Not a fan of this look - Betty Boop with a side of S&M.

And I saved the absolute BEST for last...

Glenn Close in her Asian pantsuit getup. Obviously she's in early stages of dementia.

Don't forget about her twin, Tony Shalhoub! So cute that they dressed alike.

Worst Hair Awards:

In honor of the travesty that was the red carpet last night, I decided to add a new category to the mix...

Everyone gasped in horror when Drew Barrymore stepped onto the red carpet last night. Remember the tragic green dress sans bra incident? I don't know which was worse... And why couldn't Jessica Lange and Drew detach from each other the entire night? I know you play mother and daughter in Grey Gardens, but that's no excuse for the creepy hand-holding. Sweet shades, Jess.

Warning: this is what happens if you stick a fork in a toaster.

Brigitte Nielsen looks great for forty-five.

The Bride of Chuckie's frazzled ponytail really added the soft touch that this loud dress needed. I would have given her a hairnet if she sat at my table.

Oh, she's just being Miley. Next time the presenter announces your name, your publicist might be a bit happier if you politely smiled like a lady, not stuck out your tongue. I'm so over this long extension look - when it becomes a staple in Tyra's wardrobe, you know that shit is tired. And please look at Mama Cyrus in the background - she and Miley should have switched dresses.

Don't worry - I didn't forget Ashton Kutcher's fu manchu! Winner of Worst Hair of the Night!

Beautiful Men Awards:
A little something extra for the ladies, or the men. So many beautiful men were in attendance last night that I thought I'd give you one final look at just a few...

Wonder from Down Under - Simon Baker

Jon Hamm and his girlfriend, Jennifer Westfeldt

Gerard Butler

Zachary Quinto

My favorite, Aaron Eckhart

Hahaha J/K - couldn't resist throwing Mickey Rourke into the mix!

Photos: AP Images

2009 Golden Globes

Hey y'all! It's that time of year again. Welcome to award season, everyone! Oh, how I have missed the glitz, the glamour, the dresses! I've been hitting the movies hardcore lately trying to catch up before the award shows, and I've made a pretty good dent in my list. Though I have to say, get there early or you'll be stuck with a front row seat. I was a bit appalled at the chaos that ensues when someone sits that close to the screen: make outs, nose picking, climbing seats... It's as if sitting that close drives people mad. I don't recommend it. Very distracting/slightly more entertaining than the movie.

As I'm sure you all know, the 2009 Golden Globes are TONIGHT at 8pm! Woohoo! The preshow starts at 6pm on E! and I'm so excited for my friends to come over to help me judge the dresses. Plus, I always love to see what a fool Guiliana Rancic makes of herself. Her teeth are about as blinding as Audrina Patridge's. And we all know the E! crew is installing Ryan Seacrest's step stool as we speak to make him look remotely close in height to Tom Cruise. I wish Joel McHale could host these things - he'd be much more entertaining! McHale for The Academy Awards!

The Golden Globes include both film and television. It's the elite award for television, and the Emmy equivalent for film. Here are some of my thoughts on the nominees:

Best Motion Picture - Drama:
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Frost/Nixon
The Reader
Revolutionary Road
Slumdog Millionaire

For this category, I'm going to side with every person in Hollywood and say Slumdog Millionaire should win - hands down. It's been deemed "The Little Movie That Could." I went to see this movie opening night and it was sold out, due to the buzz it had already created. I knew nothing about it, which is really the best way to experience a movie. It is absolutely magnificent. It has all the elements that make a good film - drama, comedy, romance, suspense, violence. But none of it ever feels forced. You really feel for the young boy and girl in the film and want them to escape the slums they were born into. You want the boy to legitimately win Who Wants to be a Millionaire?, instead of cheating the system. You are on the edge of your seat for most of the film, and leave with an overwhelming good feeling despite the rough content. The visuals are fantastic, thanks to director Danny Boyle of Trainspotting fame. If you haven't seen it, make sure to stick around for the Bollywood dancing scene in the credits. It's really cool to watch and reconfirms that warmth of the film. Final Answer - Slumdog Millionaire takes home The Globe!

Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture - Drama:
Anne Hathaway - Rachel Getting Married
Angelina Jolie - The Changeling
Meryl Streep - Doubt
Kristin Scott Thomas - I've Loved You So Long
Kate Winslet - Revolutionary Road

Hmm... Well, we may already have an answer to who wins this category. The New York Times posted that The Golden Globes had announced Anne Hathaway as the winner earlier this week on their website, then retracted their statement. So I guess it's no surprise if Anne wins tonight. The media has been pushing this as her standout performance for months, so her win wouldn't have been a surprise anyway.

OK, let's discuss Rachel Getting Married for a moment. Umm, if I'm paying $12 to see a movie, I expect it to be well worth that ridiculously extravagant price. This movie is like 40 minutes of plot, and 60 minutes of people gyrating across the screen. Seriously. The story revolves around Rachel getting married (obvi) and her sister Kym coming home for the celebration. Kym is, for lack of a better term, a hot mess. Alcohol addiction, rehab, and sexual promiscuity are just the beginning of her list of problems. She's doing everything she can to push away her family. Anne Hathaway really did do a fantastic job of playing the extremely damaged Kym, but the stand out performance for me was Rosemarie DeWitt as Rachel. She has been overlooked by the critics, but she really shows her depth as an actress by constantly switching between hatred and love for her sister. She epitomized how one feels when dealing with a loved one's problem with addiction. However, the father is a bit, um, fruity and I kept waiting for this subplot to begin where he comes out of the closet, but that never happened. I'm still waiting for the sequel. So all of this is happening, and intermixed is scenes of some band playing music and then the entire wedding consists of people dancing around in Indian saris. About an hour of the film has no dialogue, just the wedding guests shaking their groove things in our faces. I don't understand what on earth this has to do with the plot or why it is necessary. I think I am owed at least $6 for having to endure that portion of the film.

Angelina Jolie could win for The Changeling. I'm a little surprised that this is the only thing related to Clint Eastwood that is nominated (he also starred in and directed Gran Torino) because he has been taking home all of the awards in recent years. Angelina did an excellent job in the film, and it's based on a true story. I was a little shocked at her character Christine Collins, whose son goes missing back in 1928, because she seemed remarkably calm through most of the film. In one scene, she lashes out screaming and crying, but other than that, she seems pretty even keel. She did a great job, but if you've just lost your son, I feel like you'd shed more than a few tears.

Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture - Drama:
Leonardo Dicaprio - Revolutionary Road
Frank Langella - Frost/Nixon
Sean Penn - Milk
Brad Pitt - The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Mickey Rourke - The Wrestler

Unfortunately, the only one of these movies I've seen in Benjamin Button, so I won't be able to give a sound opinion on who should win. Mickey Rourke is the critics' choice for The Wrestler, finally winning over audiences again instead of people being mesmerized by his plastic surgery. Sean Penn, always the critics' darling, could also take home the award. I'm dying to see Milk and I hear it is a fantastic film. Brad Pitt did a good job in Button, but I don't know if it was Best Actor worthy.

Frank Langella won the Tony for Frost/Nixon. He's my pick to win. I saw Frost/Nixon during it's last week on Broadway, and I was the only person under 60 there. No joke. I'm not a history buff, and the only reason I went is because my father wanted me to. I didn't think I would enjoy it at all. However, I was mistaken. Both Frank Langella and Michael Sheen did an excellent job of portraying David Frost and Richard Nixon. With just two chairs on stage and no props, they were able to create such tension and suspense that I felt I was watching the original broadcast. I want to see the film to see how it differs from the play and if it is able to recreate the same powerful feeling on screen as it did on stage. I've heard good things and I would love it if Langella could take home the gold.

Best Motion Picture - Musical or Comedy:
Burn After Reading
Happy-Go-Lucky
In Bruges
Mamma Mia!
Vicky Cristina Barcelona

This one is tough. I love ABBA songs, but when I saw Mamma Mia! on Broadway, I couldn't stand the actress that played the main character, Sophie, and it sort of left me with a sour feeling. Amanda Seyfried played Sophie in the film version though, and I much preferred her performance. It was a good family-fun film and I definitely understand it's popularity, but winner of Best Motion Picture? I don't think so...

I haven't seen Happy-G0-Lucky or In Bruges, so I have no opinion on these. Burn After Reading was enjoyable and definitely has potential to win. It's a dark comedy that mocks our government and the lengths it will go to to cover up their shenanigans. The fact that it dares to challenge the government and that it's helmed by the Coen Brothers almost makes it a sure winner. I recommend everyone see it, but not everyone will love it. I also enjoyed Vicky Cristina Barcelona, and if anything, it made me want to get on a plane instantly and start traveling across Europe. It also has potential to win due to it being a Woody Allen film. I was taken aback at first because of the unexpected narration, but I was drawn into the stories of two young women feeling unsatisfied with their lives and needing some European adventures to spice things up. I wasn't mesmerized enough to say it's Best Motion Picture, but I'm glad it was nominated.

Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture - Musical or Comedy:
Rebecca Hall - Vicky Cristina Barcelona
Sally Hawkins - Happy-G0-Lucky
Frances McDormand - Burn After Reading
Meryl Streep - Mamma Mia!
Emma Thompson - Last Chance Harvey

As above, this is a toughie. I'm not drawn to any of these performances as standouts. Rebecca Hall should definitely be recognized as an up-and-coming new star who I hope to see a lot more of in the next few years. She's got about five films in the works, so she's someone we should keep an eye on. I adore Frances McDormand, but I'm not sure if her performance in Burn After Reading was her best work. Meryl Streep made a pretty good effort at starring in a musical, but I don't think singing "Dancing Queen" is enough to help her take home the gold.

Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture - Musical or Comedy:
Javier Bardem - Vicky Cristina Barcelona
Colin Farrell - In Bruges
James Franco - Pineapple Express
Brendan Gleeson - In Bruges
Dustin Hoffman - Last Chance Harvey

I know Pineapple Express was just another Judd Apatow comedy, but I thought it was absolutely hilarious. James Franco was amazing! He normally plays in dramatic roles, and he hasn't really touched comedy since "Freaks and Geeks" (also Apatow) years ago. He really embodied the drug dealer role and showed his comedic chops might even be better than his tendency towards the dramatic. I definitely pick him to win, though I know most people don't think it's worthy of a Globe due to it being just another slapstick comedy.

Although, I wouldn't be disappointed if Javier Bardem won. After No Country for Old Men, I didn't think I would ever be able to watch him again because he scared the absolute piss out of me. But he was fascinating in his Vicky Cristina Barcelona role, and I completely understood how he could woo three women at once. He redeemed himself in my book by portraying someone much softer than his No Country character.

Best Performance by an Actress in a Supporting Role in a Motion Picture:
Amy Adams - Doubt
Penelope Cruz - Vicky Cristina Barcelona
Viola Davis - Doubt
Marisa Tomei - The Wrestler
Kate Winslet - The Reader

This category is a toss up. I'm not a fan of Penelope Cruz, but I definitely agree with critics that she gave a knockout performance in Vicky Cristina Barcelona. She was the driving force in that film. Though it could go to either Marisa Tomei or Kate Winslet. Winslet always wins over the critics, but doesn't always take home the awards.

Best Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role in a Motion Picture:
Tom Cruise - Tropic Thunder
Robert Downey, Jr. - Tropic Thunder
Ralph Fiennes - The Duchess
Philip Seymour Hoffman - Doubt
Heath Ledger - The Dark Knight

Forgive me for saying this, but I think I am the only person who did not enjoy Tropic Thunder. I just didn't think it was that funny after all of it's hype. I kept waiting for Tom Cruise to blow me away as so many people said he would, but he only disappointed me as usual (you know what I'm talking about, Katie). I tried to not let my hatred for that little man get in the way, but he just wasn't funny. If dancing around in a fat suit is the epitome of funny, then Eddie Murphy should win greatest performance of all time for Norbit. Robert Downey, Jr. was the only shining part of the film, and he was the only thing that made me laugh the entire time.

Although, I think we all expect the award to go to Heath Ledger. He really spooked me as The Joker and definitely lived up to his hype. I have a feeling he will win, and not just because his untimely death might tug at the heartstrings of some. Heath deserves the award, no questions asked.

Best Television Series - Drama:
Dexter
House
In Treatment
Mad Men
True Blood

OMG - I love Dexter! This show gets better and better every season. I always vote for it to win, and it never does. I beg people to watch this show, but I don't think I've influenced too many people. Oh, how I wish Dexter could take home the gold. But Mad Men is all the rage these days, and I'm 90% sure it will win. Tear. I'm a little sad that Lost isn't nominated for anything - get ready for The Oceanic Six back on your TV January 21! Can't wait!!!

And though I don't think it should win, I highly recommend True Blood. Alan Ball is one of my favorite writers, but I was like vampires? Really? I just haven't been able to jump on this Twilight bandwagon like everybody else. But I decided to give it a chance recently and, excuse the pun, was sucked in immediately. I watched all 12 episodes in a matter of days... I had very little to do. The accents are horrific and the stories can be a little cheesy at times, but somehow it managed to keep me coming back for more. I've never been able to get into the fantasy genre, but this took me back to my Buffy days. I can't wait for the second season to find out just what happened to Lafayette...

Best Performance by an Actress in a Television Series - Drama:
Sally Field - Brothers & Sisters
Mariska Hargitay - Law & Order
January Jones - Mad Men
Anna Paquin - True Blood
Kyra Sedgwick - The Closer

How do I hate Brothers & Sisters? Let me count the ways. Calista Flockhart pains me to look at. Rob Lowe and Rachel Griffiths are being wasted on this show when they could best be used somewhere else. And Sally Field gets nominated every year. I hate it. I really, really hate it.

Though their Southern accents are horrendous, I enjoy both Anna Paquin and Kyra Sedgwick in their roles. Mariska Hargitay usually takes home the award, but I think January Jones stands a pretty good chance due to Mad Men being a critic favorite.

Best Performance by an Actor in a Television Series - Drama:
Gabriel Byrne - In Treatment
Michael C. Hall - Dexter
Jon Hamm - Mad Men
Hugh Laurie - House
Jonathan Rhys Meyers - The Tudors

I'm sure you all know I'm going to say Michael C. Hall. Love that guy! And he has a lot to celebrate even if he doesn't win. He just married his costar, Jennifer Carpenter, who plays his sister on the show. Kinda gross if you think about it, but they do seem cute together. The two eloped on New Year's Eve and tonight will be their first public appearance together.

Every person nominated in this category is pretty worthy of the win. Jon Hamm has been everyone's favorite this year, especially women, so he's my bet to win. I just hope Jonathan Rhys Meyers doesn't win because he terrifies me. Seriously - sends chills down my spine when he looks in the camera.

Best Television Series - Musical or Comedy:
30 Rock
Californication
Entourage
The Office
Weeds

I hate to say this, but I'm kinda over The Office. What?! The horror! I know. I spent the first few years hoping for nothing but Jim and Pam to get together, but now that they're together, I really don't like their storyline. Everything seems a little forced these days and Michael's nonsense gets more and more out there. Don't get me wrong - I still watch and I still laugh. I just miss the anticipation of yesteryear. Now the biggest disappointment to me this year is most definitely Weeds. What used to be one of the most outrageous yet emotionally realistic shows has turned into a campy nightmare. Nancy and the crew are on the run and trafficking Mexicans in some border town - and where's Conrad?! I miss him! None of it fits Nancy, whose attempt to salvage her previous middle class life by selling drugs didn't seem like too far of a stretch. Now I barely recognize her due to her antics. Disappointing, to say the least.

30 Rock deserves the award and will most likely take it home. I can't imagine any of these other shows winning. The show is nonsensical, but it all makes sense in a weird way. I could do with a few less cameos (I'm talking about you, Jennifer Aniston), but otherwise, it's one of my favorite shows on television.

Best Performance by an Actress in a Television Series - Musical or Comedy:
Christina Applegate - Samantha Who?
America Ferrera - Ugly Betty
Tina Fey - 30 Rock
Debra Messing - The Starter Wife
Mary-Louise Parker - Weeds

Normally I vote for Mary-Louise Parker, but as you read above, definitely not this year! I'm not even sure why she's nominated. And I know I'm not the only person upset with the direction Weeds is going in. I love Christina Applegate as Samantha Who?, but the stand out star to me on that show is Jennifer Esposito as drunken, gold-digging Andrea. She makes me laugh every time. However, we all know the award is going to Tina Fey. Don't confuse Liz Lemon with Sarah Palin, but both are tragic, yet hilarious hot messes in their own ways. Both comedy gold.

Best Performance by an Actor in a Television Series - Musical or Comedy:
Alec Baldwin - 30 Rock
Steve Carell - The Office
Kevin Connolly - Entourage
David Duchovny - Californication
Tony Shaloub - Monk

I don't think any votes will go to anyone but Alec Baldwin. He is my favorite character on 30 Rock besides Kenneth the Page. Baldwin might be crazy in real life, but he fuels that crazy into comedy with Jack Donaghy. While Carell and Shaloub might win over a few people, the award should most definitely go to Alec Baldwin.

Damn, there are a lot of categories for The Golden Globes. I'm exhausted after using my brain that much on a Sunday. Get pumped for the speeches and the fashion, people! I'll be glued to the TV starting at 6pm today and hoping Seacrest says something stupid upon his pedestal. I hope everyone enjoys and I can't wait to see who wins!

"Kath & Kim" - Not Worth the Hype

A fan of all things British, Australian, or Kiwi (wink, wink Jemaine), naturally I was ecstatic when I heard that the Australian show "Kath & Kim" was getting an American remake for the fall TV season. While I generally can't stand Selma Blair, I assumed pairing her with Molly Shannon might make her a little less annoying and half of a comedy powerhouse. However, I was wrong.

"Kath & Kim" is now available to watch on Yahoo! or you can download the pilot episode for free on iTunes. I downloaded it and watched it on my iPhone whilst wheezing on the elliptical machine at my gym. The best way for me to forget that I'm torturing my body is to watch comedy shows on my iPhone while I'm exercising. My staples: "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" and "Samantha Who?". When I realized I could get the pilot of "Kath & Kim" for free, I was giddy with excitement as I have been anticipating it's arrival for months now. But it didn't really result in the laughter blackout I was prepared for.

"Kath & Kim" tells the story of a mother and daughter, Molly Shannon and Selma Blair (MS is actually only 8 years older than SB in real life), who have an extremely dysfucntional relationship and have yet to realize the early 90's are over. They dress in horrendous outfits usually consisting of ill-fitting spandex and generally act like children, especially Kim. But spandex can only get you so many laughs before you start wondering when something funny is going to happen. Kim leaves her husband because he wants her to do stuff, like microwave dinner every once in a while. Kath is dating a sandwich artist. And...... that's about it. I was greatly disappointed that this is all the show had to offer. I know the physical comedy of her Mary Katherine Gallagher days are long behind us, but I was expecting more of Molly Shannon. Selma Blair has absolutely perfected the whiny brat character she plays in every film and was obviously the inspiration for Meredith Grey. She just annoyed me as usual, so bravo on that note for living up to my expectations!

It's just the pilot, and pilots are usually the worst episodes of an entire series. I wasn't so sure about "30 Rock" when I saw that pilot either, but I've since fallen in love with Liz Lemon and the antics of the crew at "TGS". So don't take my word for it... Give "Kath & Kim" a chance when it premieres on NBC Thursday night at 8:30pm. I'm going to keep watching... for now. If after three episodes it has still yet to impress, I'll give it the kiss of death (remove it from the DVR). I had higher hopes for this much hyped show, but I think we might be better off trying to find episodes online of the original version from the Outback.

Photo: via thebiz.fancast.com

Emmy Awards Tonight at 8pm!

It’s that time of year again. Fall is on its way, the leaves are changing, and the red carpet is rolling out for a long award season. So exciting!!! I have feelings of bliss overwhelming me just knowing that in a few hours time The Emmys will start, I will be able to use my magnificent gift of sight and wit to judge every dress that walks down that red carpet. It just makes me so happy! I’m watching the E! Preshow as we speak, and I feel it necessary to share with the masses that Ryan Seacrest is not that tall. He is most definitely standing on a platform. Oh, Napoleon…

Anywho, what’s an awards show without Pop Guru’s opinions? So I thought I would go for the usual format of who I think should win followed by who will actually win. You can see the full list of nominees here. Please to enjoy…

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series:
Tina Fey, “30 Rock”
Christina Applegate, “Samantha Who?”
Julia Louis-Dreyfus,”The New Adventures of Old Christine”
America Ferrera, “Ugly Betty”
Mary-Louise Parker, “Weeds”

Who Should Win: Tina Fey. I thoroughly enjoy watching the neurotic Liz Lemon every Thursday for two reasons: 1) She’s hysterical. 2) Her terrifying level of craziness makes me feel a little less crazy, so it’s like a 30 minute self-help session for me. And all I had to do was pay for my cable bill.

My vote would have normally gone to Mary-Louise Parker in the years past, but “Weeds” has really gone in the shitter these last two seasons and I’m almost at my breaking point. Will I watch next season? Yes, but it may be my last… Christina Applegate is funny (a tad campy) on “Samantha Who?”, however, she doesn’t beat Tina. I absolutely despise that “Old Christine” show and would rather drive pencils into my eyes than watch that, so Julia Louis-Dreyfus does not get my vote. I don’t watch “Ugly Betty”, but I kinda want America Ferrera to win so Maria Menonous can hurl insults at her again on live television. What a great moment in history that was.

Who Will Win: Most likely Tina. Whoop whoop! Here’s to you, Lemon!

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy Series:
Alec Baldwin, “30 Rock”
Tony Shalhoub, “Monk”
Lee Pace, “Pushing Daisies”
Steve Carell, “The Office”
Charlie Sheen, “Two and a Half Men”

Who Should Win: Alec Baldwin. He may be batshit crazy in real life, but that man is gold on the screen. He delights as Jack Donaghey and man, does he do an amazing impression of the cast of “Good Times”! My next vote would go to Steve Carell, who still manages to make me laugh as Michael Scott.

Who Will Win: Alec – expect “30 Rock” to take home most of the awards! And as far as Supporting Actor is concerned, it’s Neil Patrick Harris’ year to shine! He better take home the award for his hysterical portrayal of Barney on “How I Met Your Mother”.

Special mention: I wish Charlie Day from “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia” was nominated. That little guy deserves an award for his stellar dance moves as Green Man. Simply amazing!

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series:
Sally Field, “Brothers & Sisters”
Glenn Close, “Damages”
Mariska Hargitay, “Law & Order: Special Victims Unit”
Holly Hunter, “Saving Grace”
Kyra Sedgwick, “The Closer”

Who Should Win: Hmmm… This is a tough one. “Brothers & Sisters” is an absolutely terrible show. I just have a hard time looking at Calista Flockhart’s face for an hour. It hurts my eyes. I really like both Holly Hunter (who is scarily skinny in person, by the way) and Kyra Sedgwick, but I have to say my vote goes to Mariska. I never tire of watching “Law & Order: SVU”, until I remember that I live in NYC and it freaks me out. Mariska was just being interviewed by Ryan Seacrest and I love her tangerine dress! Not many people could pull off that color.

Who Will Win: I don’t know, but I’m guessing Glenn Close. She seems to win lots of awards, so why not this one?

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series:
James Spader, “Boston Legal”
Bryan Cranston, “Breaking Bad”
Michael C. Hall, “Dexter”
Hugh Laurie, “House”
Gabriel Byrne, “In Treatment”
Jon Hamm, “Mad Men”

Who Should Win: It’s no secret that my vote goes to Michael C. Hall. He is phenomenal as Dexter Morgan and has been robbed every other time he has been nominated. No way is Hugh Laurie better than Michael! Don’t be fooled by that British accent! And that’s saying a lot for me. I think that’s the first time I have ever chosen something American over something British. Ever. Although, I watched a few episodes of “Breaking Bad” and Bryan Cranston really did a great job as a terminally ill chemistry teacher desperately trying to make money for his family by selling crystal meth. It’s nice to see Bryan do so well in a dramatic role because I really didn’t think he was capable of doing anything but comedy after “Malcolm in the Middle”.

Who Will Win: Maybe Michael C. Hall will actually go home with the gold this year. But Hugh Laurie typically wins awards and the masses are obsessed with”Mad Men” so Jon Hamm has a good chance.

Outstanding Comedy Series:
“30 Rock”
“Curb Your Enthusiasm”
“Entourage”
“The Office”
“Two and a Half Men”

Who Should Win: “30 Rock”! It really is one of the funniest shows on television. But I’m a little worried about the mass quantity of guest stars. When you bring Oprah on your show, you’re pretty much asking for her to take over as Executive Producer and add it to her pursuit for world domination. Damn you, Oprah!

Who Will Win: “30 Rock”. But maybe “The Office”. I love “The Office”, but I don’t think it’s as funny now as it was in the beginning. Maybe Ricky Gervais had it right when he ended the UK version after two seasons.

Outstanding Drama Series:
“Boston Legal”
“Damages”
“Dexter”
“House”
“Lost”
“Mad Men”

Who Should Win: Um, I’m sorry but I had no idea “Boston Legal” was still on television. Will William Shatner ever take a break? Geez! Please don’t let this show win! I’ve watched it several times and I have no idea why it keeps getting nominated. Make it stop. My vote most certainly goes to “Lost”. That show manages to keep me glued to my TV screen for an hour and then I spend the entire next week trying to figure out what is going to happen. It’s got thousands of websites and communities of Losties devoted to it and continues to shock and amaze week to week. They even have special commercials that play during the broadcasts that give clues into the Dharma Initiative. It just amazes me how interactive this show is. “Lost” should definitely take home the gold, but if not “Lost”, “Dexter” comes in at a close second.

Who Will Win: “Mad Men” is the new favorite of all the critics, so I’m pretty sure this one will win. It’s been on my Netflix Queue under “Very Long Wait” so I have no idea when I will ever be able to watch it! One day!

So there’s my thoughts on the nominees. I’ve been watching the celebs pour in and judging their every move. America Ferrera should not be wearing that blood red lipstick! Ah! Seacrest is butchering these interviews and Marcia Cross looks like a Magnolia Bakery cupcake. Woohoo – Denis Leary is being interviewed now and he needs my full attention. Enjoy the show!!!

Oh and as an added treat, celebrity sighting of the weekend: Kirsten Dunst walking around SoHo at Houston and MacDougal with some hipster boy (and no, it wasn't Justin Long). Also, two girls from last year's reality show "Fashionista Diaries" were boozing at the beer garden in Astoria.

2007 Emmy Nominations Announced Today

Let's play "What Does Pop Guru Think!" Once again, nominations have been announced - meaning I've been giddy with excitement all day because I get to inflict my opinions upon you! For those of you who get all the awards confused, the Emmys are strictly for television. You won't see any film nominees here. So here's how it will go... I'll tell you who has been nominated, then I'll delight you with who I think will win and who I want to win (which is the most important part of this whole process). Main categories only, though. If you want to see who got nominated for Outstanding Hairstyling For A Miniseries, Movie Or A Special, then go here.

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy Series:

Ricky Gervais as Andy Millman, "Extras" - HBO
Tony Shalhoub as Adrian Monk, "Monk" - USA
Steve Carell as Michael Scott, "The Office" - NBC
Alec Baldwin as Jack Donaghy, "30 Rock" - NBC
Charlie Sheen as Charlie Harper, "Two and a Half Men" - CBS

Who I think will win: Tony Shalhoub. Doesn't this guy win every year? If not him, Alec.

Who I want to win: Shit. This is tough. Do I have to decide?? I just recently discovered "Extras" and absolutely LOVE it! Ricky Gervais is hysterical as the bumbling "Background Artist" and somehow Gervais has the power to make celebrities kiss his feet (even Madonna!). Alec Baldwin may be an ass in real life, but he is magic on the screen, my friends. And I'll always have a soft spot for Michael Scott in my heart. If someone pointed a gun at my head and forced me to choose, I'd have to go with Alec.

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series:

James Spader as Alan Shore, "Boston Legal" - ABC
Hugh Laurie as Dr. Gregory House, "House" - FOX
Denis Leary as Tommy Gavin, "Rescue Me" - F/X
James Gandolfini as Tony Soprano, "The Sopranos" - HBO
Kiefer Sutherland as Jack Bauer, "24" - FOX

Who I think will win: Hugh Laurie because (as I said before) who can resist a bumbling Brit? But it was the last year for "The Sopranos" and despite an ending most viewers hated, James could easily take home the gold.

Who I want to win: Seeing as I screamed with glee when I heard his name announced this morning (seriously - and this was before coffee), I'd have to give the Emmy to my dear friend and beloved asshole, Denis Leary.

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series:

Felicity Huffman as Lynette Scavo, "Desperate Housewives" - ABC
Julia Louis-Dreyfus as Christine Campbell, "The New Adventures of Old Christine" - CBS
Tina Fey as Liz Lemon, "30 Rock" - NBC
America Ferrera as Betty Suarez, "Ugly Betty" - ABC
Mary-Louise Parker as Nancy Botwin, "Weeds" - Showtime

Who I think will win: America Ferrera. I just hope Maria Menounos is on the sidelines when she wins to crush her to the very core by asking America how she feels when people call her "thick".

Who I want to win: Well, considering I can't even look at Felicity Huffman without picturing her prosthetic member from Transamerica, definitely NOT her. And I absolutely despise Old Christine, New Christine, Ugly Christine, and any and all Christines involved with that show. Everybody knows I want my favorite pot dealing, coffee drinking Mom to take home that trophy... Mary-Louise! You know, I don't blame her for taking to the ganj. That's probably the only way I could be a mother.

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series:

Sally Field as Nora Walker, "Brothers & Sisters" - ABC
Kyra Sedgwick as Dep. Chief Brenda Leigh Johnson, "The Closer" - TNT
Mariska Hargitay as Detective Olivia Benson, "Law & Order: Special Victims Unit" - NBC
Patricia Arquette as Allison Dubois, "Medium" - NBC
Minnie Driver as Dahlia Malloy, "The Riches" - F/X
Edie Falco as Carmela Soprano, "The Sopranos" - HBO

Who I think will win: Kyra Sedgwick. Her Southern accent is not quite right (none of my friends from Atlanta have Southern accents... Weird), but I've spent a lazy day (or two) watching marathons of this show and it is quite entertaining. And it's quite refreshing, as refreshing as crime shows can be when they are played on constant repeat on TV all day long. But the same goes for Edie as it did for James Gandolfini... Edie might take the award for the last season of "The Sopranos". I know, I know. It's all so political.

Who I want to win: Kyra, but if not her, Mariska. I like Mariska. I just wish she would stop cutting her hair to look like a detective. How Method of her. Minnie Driver's wretched Southern accent is what kept me from enjoying "The Riches", so not her. And Patricia Arquette... Uh, I didn't even know "Medium" was still on the air, so I just want to extend to her my congratulations for having like four viewers left.

Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series:

Kevin Dillon as Johnny Drama, "Entourage" - HBO
Jeremy Piven as Ari Gold, "Entourage" - HBO
Neil Patrick Harris as Barney Stinson, "How I Met Your Mother" - CBS
Rainn Wilson as Dwight K. Schrute, "The Office" - NBC
Jon Cryer as Alan Harper, "Two and a Half Men" - CBS

Who I think will win: Most likely, Jeremy Piven. I was bored to tears with the first few episodes of this season of "Entourage", so I have no idea what his acting ability has been like. I feel like he is a big contender, though.

Who I want to win: My first instinct is to shout, wait for it... "Barney! Barney! Barney!" But then I have pangs of guilt because I'm a devoted Dwight fan with a Dwight bobblehead on my bookshelf. I would be happy with either (but don't think they'll win - but I will psychotically jump up and down on my couch like Tom Cruise if either do).

Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Drama Series:

William Shatner as Denny Crane, "Boston Legal" - ABC
T.R. Knight as George O'Malley, "Grey's Anatomy" - ABC (By the way, apparently The Academy of Television Arts and Sciences has never heard of IMDB as they listed T.R. Knight's character simply as George. He has a last name, people. Isaiah Washington would go postal on your ass if you forgot his character's last name.)
Masi Oka as Hiro Nakamura, "Heroes" - NBC
Michael Emerson as Ben Linus, "Lost" - ABC (Again, had to add the last name. Maybe The Academy should buy a TV. Or perhaps I should get a life. Either/or.)
Terry O'Quinn as John Locke, "Lost" - ABC
Michael Imperioli as Christopher Moltisanti, "The Sopranos" - HBO

Who I think will win: Wow! Big category. Six nominees instead of five. Michael Imperioli. People like him for some reason. I don't watch "The Sopranos", so I have no idea why. If not him, Masi Oka. People are obsessed with "Heroes" so I think he has a fighting chance. I'm waiting for the first season to come out on DVD so I can find out what the big deal is.

Who I want to win: Like there is even a moment of hesitation for me to say Michael Emerson. He is the creepiest MoFo on television as "Others" leader Ben Linus - so scary he sneaks into my dreams at night to haunt me. I'd be delighted for either him or Terry O'Quinn to win. I still think O'Quinn was robbed when he didn't win the Oscar for playing Kate's father in The Cutting Edge. The bastards! I would be so disappointed if the winner is...get ready to gasp, ladies and gays... T.R. Knight. Not only has "Grey's" lost its spark, but George's flame has dwindled, as well.

Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series:

Jaime Pressly as Joy Turner, "My Name is Earl" - NBC
Jenna Fischer as Pam Beesly, "The Office" - NBC
Holland Taylor as Evelyn Harper, "Two and a Half Men" - CBS
Conchata Ferrell as Berta, "Two and a Half Men" - CBS (According to IMDB, Berta has no last name. I guess that's what happens when you play the maid.)
Vanessa Williams as Wilhelmina Slater, "Ugly Betty" - ABC
Elizabeth Perkins as Celia Hodes, "Weeds" - Showtime

Who I think will win: I gotta go with Joy. "Earl" stands alone as a funny show but when I hear that raspy laugh, I can't help but double over and knee-slap simultaneously. Joy stands true to her name by bringing me happiness every Thursday night at 8/7 central. So help me if Vanessa Williams wins. Remember that hair at The Golden Globes? She should be committed after that shit.

Who I want to win: Obviously, Joy. Sorry, Pam. We've had some good laughs and I think you're great and all, but the awkward moments between you and Jim prove too much for me sometimes and I blush with embarrassment at horrid memories that arise. And I'd absolutely love for Elizabeth Perkins to win because she really has the funniest role on "Weeds"... But I just don't know if that's going to happen. For those of you wondering who the F Holland Taylor is, my generation will remember her as Dean McMann from "Saved by the Bell: The College Years". Cause I'm standing at the edge of tomorrow, TODAY! Today, today, today...

Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Drama Series:

Rachel Griffiths as Sarah Whedon, "Brothers & Sisters" - ABC
Katherine Heigl as Dr. Isobel “Izzie” Stevens, "Grey's Anatomy" - ABC
Chandra Wilson as Dr. Miranda Bailey, "Grey's Anatomy" - ABC
Sandra Oh as Dr. Cristina Yang, "Grey's Anatomy" - ABC
Aida Turturro as Janice Soprano, "The Sopranos" - HBO
Lorraine Bracco as Dr. Jennifer Melfi, "The Sopranos" - HBO

Who I think will win: Another six nominee category. I don't know, one of the "Grey's" bitches. Take your pick.

Who I want to win: Lorraine Bracco. Not because I know what her character is like, but because I like her in Goodfellas and I saw her in The Container Store once and she seemed like a cool bitch. I like Chandra Wilson all right, so I'm ok with her, too. I'm really sad Chloe Sevigny was not nominated for "Big Love" because she really is fantastic as Nicki, the shopaholic Polygamist.

And finally, the biggest awards of the night...

Outstanding Comedy Series:

"Entourage" - HBO
"The Office" - NBC
"30 Rock" - NBC
"Two and a Half Men" - CBS
"Ugly Betty" - ABC

Who I think will win: Hijo de puta! F-ing "Ugly Betty". Something about this show makes me want to run in horror and never look back. Ever.

Who I want to win: I mean, obviously "The Office". Those who have never worked in an office environment cannot appreciate the humor and politics of this show. I wish I could have inherited a large sum of money from a very distant great aunt and never have worked in an office either. But I have, so I laugh. "30 Rock" started out rocky, excuse the pun. But it has turned out to be a laugh-out-loud comedy and I would be happy for Tina Fey to take home this trophy, as well.

Outstanding Drama Series:

"Boston Legal" - ABC
"Grey's Anatomy" - ABC
"Heroes" - NBC
"House" - FOX
"The Sopranos" - HBO

Who I think will win: "Heroes" or "The Sopranos", but I can't judge those two.

Who I want to win: Can I say none of these? Where is "Lost"? "Rescue Me"? I guess "Heroes" because I have a slight inclination that I'm going to like it. Damn.

Whew! That just took me forever, so enjoy it. And I know it's going to come back and bite me on the ass when you people remind me of my wrong predictions when The Emmys air live on FOX September 16 at 8/7c. But I'm all excited about the Second Annual Pop Guru Emmy Fashion Awards I will be giving out after the event! Can't wait! Have a good weekend!